So many people have been asking how I feel. Things feel rather strange right now. It's getting to feel like those last couple of nights before Prom or the few remaining days of final summer in High School: The ones just before you leave for College. I remember that time as one of great happiness but also of trepidation and immense anxiety. I've been calm, happy and nervous. I've had so many good wishes from friends and a quiet restful time but I know that's going to change big time and there is one amazing new future to come: One I've dreamed about for so long. That change from one chapter of my life to another is a really huge one......and being this close, it seems to be coming up real fast! My surgery date is in four days time.....
It's quiet and dark. I'm in bed early because I still feel tired. I'm having my hair styled and colored tomorrow (this is so like Prom) yet, like leaving for College in Manchester back in '76; I'm also putting the last few things in my bag to get ready for a departure....Both times leaving on my own, doing it on my own, feeling a little scared.....but strangely happy.
Hugs
Jane xox
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I love the image of the summer before college. For most people, that is the first step into their adult lives. Just hearing about it elicits a feel of excitement and longing. Once again, you get to experience that leap of faith. I am both nervous and excited for you.
ReplyDeleteIt's strange, but the feelings that year and now seem almost identical; a quiver of nervous anticipation to an event I seem to have been preparing for so long. There is a 'first time' quality to that feeling which has totally engaged my mind, focus and consciousness....
ReplyDeleteHugs, Jane xox